The last few days have been pretty mellow. I worked today for the school district and that was a nice break. It seems there is always too much paperwork to deal with, but I am wading through it. I decided I need a heavy duty paper shredder! I have so many papers to go through and get rid of.
As for me, I am enjoying my exercise routine and physical therapy. I am learning a lot about why I have knee and hip pain and what I can do to strengthen it. Right now they have my kneecap taped so it will stay where it should and ride smoother. We will see how my knee does in my step class tomorrow! The exercising is a great outlet for me. It helps me feel stronger and refreshed. It involves taking time for myself that I really enjoy. I think it even helps me to stay centered. It is even great therapy.
The kids seem to be doing well. Jeffrey is enjoying his college classes and Marie is enjoying her new place in Utah. I miss my grandson something awful. Rachel is working through finals and holding together pretty well. I am worried about next week when her classes change and she has to get used to a few new teachers. She really struggles in Math and loves her current teacher but she has to move to a different class to fit her Western Civilization class in. Bummer. Math is one of the things that triggers her anxiety attacks. I pray she will do well with the change.
Anxiety is a funny little monster. Rachel is so worried about having an anxiety attack in public that she had learned to control it enough until she is alone with me. Then she lets loose. I think Jeffrey and Marie are the only other people who have seen her have a full blown anxiety attack. This made me ponder something. For almost 20 years Mike kept his depression a secret from everyone around him. I remember telling people and they looked at me like I was crazy. I felt that no one believe me that he had depression. I kind of feel that way again. No one ever sees Rachel having an attack so I feel they don't think it is as bad as I say. It can be very frustrating and I feel bad for Rachel because she is so hard on herself. She goes back to the therapist on Monday and maybe we can get more ideas on how to handle these attacks.