A Great Way to Spend Thanksgiving!

Well the kids all wanted to get away and do something different for Thanksgiving so we did. We are in Victoria BC right now having a blast. Thank you to some wonderful friends for giving us their time share. In two days we have walked all over Victoria sight seeing and eating! In the evening we play games (usually Killer Bunnies) and watch a movie. It is so fun to just hang out with the kids and laugh. For Thanksgiving Dinner we had a fantastic lunch at a Japanese Restaurant in Canada. Now that is different! Then around 5 we went to Milestones for appetizers and dessert. I love good food.
We are getting ready to head down to the gym right now and then off for a day of tourist attractions like the Wax Museum and underwater aquarium. Should be another fun day. So this holiday hasn't been too bad because we have kept busy doing something different. Good way to get through tough times!

Milestones - "Happy Birthday Mike"

Well this week has been fun and long. I worked at the high school which was fun. I had my hips and lower back go out twice which wasn't fun. I learned to play "rock band" on the wii with a fun group of kids. I went to see the midnight show of TWILIGHT with a carload of girls, which was a blast and I dealt with an interesting situation with Rachel at our church youth group. So life is normal and good. My computer freaked out on me too and I lost a folder in my Outlook that had all our holiday activities in it... I hope I can figure it all out again!
Saturday will be a difficult milestone for us. I haven't brought it up so I don't know if the kids remember that Mike's birthday is the 22 of November. I have reminded Rachel several times that we will have a lot of firsts this year. This is one of them. Mike would be 52. In the past, we didn't celebrate Mike's birthday real big, but we would always go out to dinner and have a gift or two. This year I think we are kind of hiding from the normal things. That is why we are taking off for the holidays; we just don't want to do the traditional normal things.
I was frustrated this week when I had car and computer problems and he wasn't here to fix them. Makes me feel a bit helpless. I also haven't been able to deal with putting a marker on the grave yet. It just weirds me out to have a large marker with my name on it too, so I just ignore it. I wish I new someone in Mose Lake that could at least go put flowers on the grave. I hope we all get though tomorrow okay. Maybe I will just keep busy.

Negitive List VS the Positive List

Another week has gone by and I don't know what I did with it! Chris came home from his 6 month Army training and is with us now. They will stay until Christmas. I will cherish the time I have left with my little grandson. He is son darn cute. Chris' parents came up for the weekend and we had fun celebrating Ethan's 1st birthday. Lots of food and fun times!
Rachel and I went to Redmond on Monday night. Tuesday I had a great time at lunch with my old FLC co-workers. (and no that doesn't mean they are OLD!) I mentioned something to them that I have learned. We all have a mental list of all the things we don't like or that drive us crazy about our spouse or even a friend. I call it the negative list. There is also a list of all the things we love about them. We as a people, tend to dwell too much on the negative list. The things that drive us crazy or that we hate. We need to be more positive and dwell on the good list. It makes life much more enjoyable. If you dwell on the negative list you can become bitter, angry and cynical. It just isn't healthy and it rips apart relationships.

I am convinced that daily enticements are placed in front of us to help us grow and see what we will choose. Will we choose best or better, anger or happiness, the good list or the negative list. I see people making these choices all the time. When you are driving and someone cuts you off. Do you get angry at the person or do say a pray for the person who seems to be having a bad day driving? When a child spills milk all over the floor, do you get mad and criticize the child or can you laugh and say oh well accidents happen. I have been working on the positive side of things for years. Sometimes I am better at it then at other times, but I can promise this: If you work on being positive, gentle, loving and forgiving, you will become a better person. The world needs more people who are tolerant, patient, loving and forgiving. One person can make a difference but if a lot of us try this, I believe we can change the world one life at a time. Start with yours, I am.

Rambling Thoughts

Well it has been an eventful week as always! I fell on Saturday, something I tend to do from time to time. When we bought the house here, Mike liked the fact that there were only two front steps. He was hoping it would lessen the falls. I think I fall just to live up to my name. . . anyway, within the first month here I fell going up the stairs and did a face plant on the front porch in front of Mike. We both just laughed. Only two steps and I still fall over them. So Saturday when I fell down the the two steps in the garage, I just sat there and laughed. Then I realized this fall really hurt. It has been three days and the doctors office still hasn't called me back after the x-rays on my foot. Time for a new doctor! I don't really have a doctor here yet; I just go to the walk in clinic. That is my first mistake!
I just called them for the second time and had to leave a message of course. Oh well good thing I have a high tolerance to pain.
Prayers have been paying off. We found a place for the kids in Utah. That is a burden off my shoulders. Now lets pray that the sale of the farm in Warden goes smoothly and that someone will buy the house in Redmond. I just want to consolidate. Mike could deal with accounts all over and different properties. It is too much for me. I am trying to make it easier for my non financial brain!
I am kind of rambling today because my mind is scattered. I have been trying to finish thank-yous and put away all the stuff from the funeral. It is not that it should take this long, but if you have ever been through this it is hard and sometimes painful. I was looking on line at old e-mails between Mike and I last night. Some where fun and others were hard to read. When he took himself off his medication last December, he thought he felt better but he got agitated easily. That wasn't normal for Mike and it was one of the things that tipped me off to know something was wrong. He wrote a few mean e-mails to me at that time which was really out of character for him. I now understand why and I'm not bitter; I just can't get myself to delete them. Maybe it is because it makes me feel hurt again and feeling hurts is better then feeling nothing. Maybe it helps me to feel justified when I was upset with him so that I don't think it was my fault for his pain and given up hope. The mind is an amazing thing. We allow it do so much to heal and so much to hurt ourselves. Anyway, I am rambling. it is my way of getting out of doing what I have to. Pay bills and write thank-you notes.
By the way, my sister-in-law gave me a book she compiled with all of the messages our friends wrote about Mike. It was really nice to read. It reminded me of the good man he was and how much he did for others. I wish more people could be like Mike, well at least the Mike without depression. That Mike was fun to be with.